3 Small Steps to PEACE that are giant leaps for your soul
How many of us have one thing in our lives that is left unsolved, a need unmet, a search unrealized? Just one thing that is lingering out there on our “to do” or “goals” lists that we just can’t get to happen no matter how hard we try, and the bruise on our foreheads feels black and blue from endless pounding against the wall of this THING that won’t seem to budge! As if questions were the keys to turn the lock on the answers for which we search, we ask them over and over again to ourselves, or anyone listening, Higher Up or otherwise: When will we break through? When will it happen or when will THE ANSWER finally come? When will he or she finally arrive in my life? When will I get to do x,y,z? When will they finally understand? When will I get relief? What am I doing wrong?
So many questions, so few answers, and God’s (or your higher power’s) “silence” is often deafening. So we sink into our coping, try another avenue, vent more, pray more, write more or, worse, do something else “more” that damages our hearts and lives just to get through until we have “it”, because to our struggling souls, “it” is the only way to find PEACE. Yet, is there is a lesson in the struggle of questioning? Is there a way to find PEACE without having the “it” we seek?
In fact, the struggle is where we find what we’re seeking …the learning, the growth, the enlightenment, the refining, the healing, relief and, ultimately, sustainable PEACE. For some, the struggle sitting in physical pain that won’t relinquish, wondering what all of the searching for the “right” medical care is about and wondering IF there even is a “right” doctor out there to give relief, or if pain/disease is their burden to carry through life. For some, it’s sitting in isolation and loneliness that feels bottomless while looking for, waiting for, preparing for that someone with whom life can be witnessed and shared — the hollow solitude of being a “party of one” finally filled with another to make it the oh-so-desirable “party of two”. Which leads to the struggle for others waiting for that little one, that tiny life to enter their world and to rock that world in the best way possible, and to give a legacy, branches to their family tree.
The list of struggles is as endless as fingerprints are unique. All share one thing in common, though, fatigue, unrest, being tired of “learning from the journey” and from being in the struggle and having NO PEACE! We’re exhausted and, frankly, angry that the answer hasn’t come and neither has the PEACE we crave. Struggles in the messiness of life. Tick….tock….tick…tock. Nothing but silence. No answers…at least so it seems.
In those moments, when peace is most distant, we tend to cry out — What am I doing wrong?? What am I doing right that I should be doing more of? Not only in pain physically (as is so often the case because the body is the primary storehouse for stress), but lost in pain emotionally, as well. Yet it is at these painful moments precisely that we must get up, however spent we are, because relinquishing and staying stuck won’t help to end the struggle and it definitely won’t help to find PEACE. The quickest way to get through, actually gain from the struggle and to find PEACE, regardless of how long the struggle lasts, is to follow 3 seemingly difficult but surprisingly easy steps that are giant leaps for your soul:
Relax into the struggle. “What you resist persists” (Carly Jung), so as hard as it is, taking a deep breath and relaxing into the struggle will allow it to pass more peacefully, and often more quickly. Definitely more enjoyably.
Rest your body, mind and soul (literally!). Shift your emotional gaze up away from the immediate circumstances and to the bigger picture of life beyond this to gain perspective and reassurance that Someone has a purview far bigger than this immediate storm. Visualize doing this mentally and pray or meditate, take a nap, listen to soothing music, take a hot bath. Do whatever will allow you to exhale, rest and be at PEACE both in your body and soul.
Realize that often the wall we feel is blocking the answer and PEACE is actually ourselves. We are our worst and most relentless opponent, but we can also be our biggest ally by paying attention to what our struggling self needs – just ask! The answer will come and so will the peace.
It’s such a hard thing to learn, and something we have to keep learning time and time again. In the end, it’s such a relief to know that God (or your higher power) doesn’t struggle with us and is always at PEACE. He watches patiently on the sidelines, knowing our fiercest opponent is our own human tendency to lose hope, throwing peace aside, and to think that the struggle is meaningless and pointless. Really the struggle is about teaching us that we cannot do it on our own nor without peace, not because we’re horribly inadequate or incapable, but because we were never designed to do so. He’s waiting with open arms, with PEACE, as well as the solution in hand at the right time and in the right way, knowing all of the steps in between are necessary to give us His best. He soothes us. He says…My child stop struggling, stop trying so so hard, stop exhausting yourself with searching for “IT”. The PEACE you crave is in your rest and surrender to ME, to the higher power that is in charge of it all. The answer WILL come and none of your efforts can hasten or hinder it, but they can change how you feel along the journey. Breathless, exhausted and resentful or refreshed, renewed and joyful because you’ve maintained your PEACE. The choice is yours my precious little one. I can’t make it for you, and I’ve made it as easy as I could possibly make it, so just reach out. Take what little strength you have left to touch it, hook your pinky around it…whatever you can do it will come to you. Just stretch out your hand…I’m here.
And then it arrives….PEACE.
If this hit home for you, there would be no greater thanks than to have you share it or forward it on to a friend, family member or anyone who comes to mind. I love hearing from you always, so please share your comments with me below or via email and let’s connect!
With gratitude and blessings,
Amy